How to let him know you’re interested

how to let him know you are interested

Wondering how to let him know you’re interested (without telling him)? Easy! There are just two things you need to remember.

1. What belongs to you comes to you

It’s pointless chasing someone who isn’t sure they’re into you; and I don’t want to have to convince anyone I’m worth time! If he remains unresponsive after several attempts to pique his interest (by exhibiting yours), reconsider why you’re interested in someone so undeserving of you.

2. Smile

This is your secret weapon, you’re back-up plan and you’re get-out-of-jail-free card. Purposive use of this facial expression works miracles (in all spheres of life).


Create and/or exploit opportunities to either speak to or be in the same general vicinity as the person you’re interested in.

In conversation

When speaking to the person you’re interested in project quiet confidence (even if you don’t feel it) and SMILE. Be lively, attentive and subtly flirtatious. Maintain eye contact and exhibit signs of being interested in and engaged by his conversation and/or presence.

Flattery isn’t required but neither is ‘teasing’. It’s difficult to ‘tease’ without crossing over into perceived criticism; you want him to enjoy your company and having someone ridicule your shortcomings isn’t fun. Avoid this ‘banter’ if you don’t know the guy and/or he doesn’t use this conversational style with others. Stick to chatting about him and the your commonalities. Be perceptive, instinctive, light-hearted.


Flirting is the subtle use of sexual energy to generate sexual tension – dependent on creating then maintaining a balance of the two in a measured, controlled way. Gradually, you can choose to ramp up this sexually charged playfulness, or play it down, depending on circumstance. With open posture, lean into him; you could now make light physical contact with arm/shoulder area (only this area). Easy if you gesticulate and are naturally demonstrative, but if you wouldn’t naturally do this to others, don’t attempt it now; it’ll appear and feel awkward. When done consciously, licking your lips, flipping your hair and looking at his mouth appears ridiculous and artificial. You’ll look foolish if you adopt a ‘sexy’ (or otherwise) act.

In the same room

Don’t make a beeline for him and/or contrive obvious and embarrassing ways to involve yourself in his conversation or get his attention. Glance at him until you’ve caught his eye, then meet his gaze and smile – but otherwise, treat him like anyone else. Be subtle, don’t over-stare, and don’t look away hastily when you’ve caught his eye (however shy you are). This will appear as though you have issues (with him).

Once you’ve smiled, don’t look over more than once more, even if he smiles back. He may turn away unresponsive (after you’ve smiled); this isn’t necessarily a bad sign. He may be shy or startled. There’ll be other opportunities to catch his eye again (and see if he responds) – but on another day.

Be patient: expressing your interest in this way often takes time. can connect you to over 3.5 million singles in the UK and with our blog you don't have to go far to get the best dating advice on the interweb!

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