Date your best friend


There’s a key ingredient missing from so many relationships these days. People keep wondering how to improve their relationships, how to get along with their significant others better, how to become one of those couples that just has ‘it’. The answer is simple people: The ‘it’ that those annoyingly cute couples have is friendship.

We have become so obsessed with creating perfect relationships that we often look past the necessary ingredient that really generates staying power. Being friends with the person you’re dating is essential; being best friends with that person should be what you strive for. Think about it, you’re probably dating someone with hopes of creating a life together, right? This is a person you spend most of your time with and someone who will see you on your most god awful days if you end up getting married or staying together for the long haul. Why on earth would you not be best friends with this person?
Sure, good dinner convos and high intensity sparks are great indicators that you’re on the right path to something real, but there needs to be more. There needs to be depth. You need to be able to be yourself with this person. You need to be comfortable enough to let them see who you are when no one else is around. After all, this is how the best friendships work, right?

You need to be with a person who makes you feel at ease; someone you can be totally open with. You need to date someone you can be silly with and laugh with, someone you can dance and sing with. Develop a relationship with someone who lets you be you and who allows you to speak your mind. If you’re ever scared to be yourself or say how you feel with the person you’re dating then you might want to start re-evaluating things. Why subject yourself to a life of insecurity, worried that you’ll be judged for every move you make? Sorry, but that’s not what lasting relationships are made of.

Sometimes it’s not even that the person makes you feel insecure, it’s just that your friendship chemistry is off. Think about someone you’ve known for years but could never develop that real bond with. That happens with relationships too. You might get along with someone fine but if that deeper friendship never forms you really aren’t left with much besides the physical attraction (which, by all means, is great if that’s all you’re looking for).

Jeremy Taylor wrote “Love is friendship set on fire” and there is nothing truer than his words. If you want a relationship that will last and bring out the best in you, find a friend within the fireworks. When we’re kids, we talk about how cool it would be if we could live with our best friends and spend all our time together. Well, now you have the chance.

Relationships that lead to happily ever after are always rooted in true friendship, true companionship. It’s the main ingredient you need to make it work; it’s the flour in your cake of life.

Married to my best friend,
The Love Hawk


With degrees in Communications, Psychology, and Broadcast Journalism I've always been passionate about writing but it wasn't until I paired it with my love for relationship advice that I found my niche. I work in Marketing and run my blog (www.thelovehawk,com) during my free time. I like white wine, the Backstreet Boys, and watching football on Sundays. Like me on Facebook at and follow me on Twitter @TheLoveHawk.

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